Smurfs, Blue Man Group A No-Show for Blue Lives Matter Rally

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Buffalo, NY—It is a snub that is certain to rub many on social media the wrong way. The Smurfs, members of the Blue Man Group as well as other blue people were absent for a Blue Lives Matter march that took place at Cazenovia Park in Buffalo, NY. “We’re confused,” said Brian Walowski, an organizer of the event. “This rally was for them and for all blue people of this country. We just wanted them to know that their lives matter too.” Other notable absences were Wolverine, The Blues Brothers and Blue from Blues Clues.

The rally, which came on the hells of the Black Lives Matter movement, has been criticized by some as being meaningless detraction since there is no evidence for the existence of a blue people, but Walowski says he speaks for many others when he disagrees. “The Smurfs are blue. The Blue Man Group is blue. The Na’vi people on Pandora are blue. Paul Giamatti in Big Fat Liar was definitely blue. There are many blue people in our world and their lives matter. That’s all we’re saying.” When pressed by reporters why these blue people were a no-show for the rally, Walowski shrugged with bewilderment. “It’s hard to say. It really is. Maybe they’re attending some other rally. I don’t know, but what I do know is that the blue lives are out there and their lives matter too.”-Ahmad Jordan

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